Outfit Of The Day

It's rather warm for an autumn day, and the trees are already so pretty, these are my favorite times of the year..

I just love this coat (especially the shoulder pads!)

This skirt is probably my most-worn item, and the top my lightest.. 

These ankle-boots are just perfect for autumn-weather, I just love them so much

Quick but pretty hairdo, with a jewelled comb I just stuck into the side of the bun.

Also one of my favorites, this necklace belongs to my mother, but I borrow it from time to time :)

And this beautiful bracelet, luckily it seems to go with any of my outfits 

 I love the cooler half of the year, it gives you so much freedom, fashion-wise; coats, boots, layered skirts, patterned tights, cute hats (when the time comes)... And everythings becomes so beautiful in autumn!

Lovely Sounds - Sopor Aeternus & The Ensemble of Shadows

Sopor Aeternus & The Ensemble of Shadows, Sopor Aeternus for short, is a darkwave musical project founded in 1989 by Anna-Varney Cantodea. In her work she mainly deals with pain, depression, isolation and the topic of suicide; all of these are the base of the "sacred trinity of [her] music, poetry and visual appearance". It is intended as a kind of self-therapy.Sopor Aeternus & The Ensemble of Shadows, Sopor Aeternus for short, is a darkwave musical project founded in 1989 by Anna-Varney Cantodea. In her work she mainly deals with pain, depression, isolation and the topic of suicide; all of these are the base of the "sacred trinity of [her] music, poetry and visual appearance". It is intended as a kind of self-therapy.

In her work Cantodea fuses elements of classical, medieval and electronic music, which I personally like a lot, because the music itself contrasts with the vocals, since it lighter and more playful. 

I'm still discovering, but so far "Hello", "A Strange Thing To Say", "Some Men Are Chocolate" and "We Have A Dog To Exercise" are my favorite songs.

Like the aesthetic, the music takes a bit of an open mind (which can't be practiced enough), because it is quite special, but it's nice to have something one has to think about for a moment, and that isn't clear from the start.

Virtual Shopping (restyle)

Restyle has such beautiful things... How good that my birthday and Christmas are coming up!

Gothic Quaintrelle?

I recently stumbled scross the word "quaintrelle" . I had read it before, but (for whatever reason) not given it much thought, let alone realized that it is the female counterpart to the dandy. I've searched for that kind of thing before, but  only finding the "femme dandy" and similar things (which is wonderful as well, but simply not for me), and was quite delighted to find that there was in fact a kind of movement (for lack of a better word) for us ladies (who don't have an androgynous, but very feminine style), and I don't have to create it myself.

a take on "femme dandy"

It is, however, not quite what I was looking for, though the ultimate goth guide published a post on the idea of the "goth quaintrelle", which is much closer to my style and ideals.

Of course the definition (or anatomy) isn't a fixed set of rules, if I can compare it to the very similar philosophy of dandyism. There are some things which remain more or less the same, whoever you ask, but the details vary from person to person.  While I see how a little snobbism (not arrogance!) has it's aesthetic, I don't like the idea of playing games to reach goals or the lack of empathy which quaintrellism declaires part of the "quaintrelle anatomy". I used to share that opinion, but have moved away from it.

I just can't wait to graduate and move some place different (better?). At the same time I'm a little scared that it won't turn out as I hope it will... What if I don't meet people with similar ideas and opinions as me?

Oh, I'm not going to think about that!

Quaintrelle

(n.) a woman who emphazises a life of passion, expressed through personal style, leisurely pastimes, charm, and cultivation of life's pleasures.

To Be Remembered

Success means having the courage, determination, and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be.

(source) 

Who am I?

I'm a German girl with a gothy-victorian style, turning 18 in December, going to school until I get my Abitur next year. I love ballroom dancing, drawing, literature and art in general. I'm half American and want to go to Boston or Washington State (or something similar) to study design. Oscar Wilde and Dita von Teese are the closest things I have to role models, I live in a tiny town in Germany where one day is the same as yesterday and 98% of the people look exactly the same and are content just where they are.

 So much for the facts, but that's not what is meant by the question in the title.

It's a question I'm sure everyone has asked before, and will ask in the future. Why is it so difficult to answer? Or is it only me who likes to have a clear picture of herself? Mainly I ask this question over and over again is because I want to grow, evolve into the person I want to be. But who is that? The vision of that person is too blurred for me to actually pursue actively changing.

I've always felt different from the rest, ever since I can remember I haven't quite fit in, even when I tried. In general I don't mind, I desire to be different and take my pride in it, but it can be pretty lonely over time, when there is no one to share all those wonderful and beautiful things with. I haven't always been focused on style and fashion, but since I started I gravitated towards everything alternative, shifting from one subculture to the next, until I found the one I felt the most comfortable in: Goth. For whatever reason the word seems so harsh, and my style is everything but that. I love the Victorian Goth sub-group, and I've always loved that part of history. I love promenading through the hallways of my school and the streets of the tiny town I live in wearing high-heeled lace-up boots and skirts, with my hair in fancy up-dos or sweeping curls, with dark red lips matching my hair-color. I love black, and I love the romantic designs of neo-Victorianism.

I feel beautiful and strong in an outfit well put together and perfect makeup, and I like combining elegance with a dark sense of beauty. I don't remember when I discovered the idea of the elegant lifestyle and the hint of aristocracy. It's not about actually being aristocratic, more about creating yourself and transforming something simple (the average life) into something beautiful and special.

There's something about people who started with little and made their life a form of art, constantly being surrounded by beauty, both physically and spiritually. That is something I want to achieve, especially since I began exploring the world of dandyism and it's philosophies. I share the nostalgia which is often part of the lifestyle. I've also developed a certain elitism, not necessarily focused on social background, but what is done with it. One doesn't choose the life one is born into, but staying there is a choice.

I want to find a world populated with people like this, who ,like me, want more from life, the fine things that make life so much more beautiful. I know it exists, I know that I am not alone, but I can't wait to leave my hometown and find it. I dream of a world where manners and education matter and are not something to frown upon, where people indulge in art and literature, music and fashion, a world of vintage (but timeless) elegance, where traditions and modern achievements are fused to one.

I want to become all that. As dandies personify male style and elegance in looks and behavior, I want to be the female version of that. How is it that there is no sign of a similar female movement? Is it really that unnecessary? I don't think so. Where are the ladies, combining past beauty and elegance with the strength we have? Why is being feminine and ladylike so often associated with the man-pleasing housewife? A woman doesn't have to be masculine to be strong, our sex has traits that are wonderful, even if they are 'typical' female. Being gentle and caring and well dressed doesn't exclude being strong and independent.

I want to be a lady, and a strong and independent woman, I want to be gentle, beautiful and charming, well-mannered and educated, and I'm a feminist. And some time in my life I wish to be surrounded by people like me, ladies and gentlemen, dandies at heart.